Part 1: You are Not Each Other’s Enemies

The Man said, “Finally! Bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh! Name her Woman for she was made from Man.” Therefore a man leaves his father and mother and embraces his wife. They become one flesh. The two of them, the Man and his Wife, were naked, but they felt no shame.
— Genesis 2:23-25, The Message

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.
— Ephesians 6:12, NIV

The first thing you need to know is that marriage is fabulously hard. It may not seem like it at first when everything is all sunshine and roses and neither of you can do any wrong. But the time will come when the days get long and you seem distant and further apart than you’ve ever been.

Don’t get us wrong. Marriage is AWESOME. Being married is probably one of the better decisions we’ve made. But if we were to tell you that it would be “ALL AMAZING ALL THE TIME!” then we would be liars and you’d have no reason to trust us. Yes, the majority of our time together has been great but hard times have and will come.

In those times, it’s vital to remember that you and your spouse are not each other’s enemies. Regardless of the situation or what you might be going through, you need to be your spouse’s biggest cheerleader. You need to be in their corner. To have their best interests at heart and believe that they have your best interests at heart as well. There should be no one who speaks more highly of your spouse than you.

Sure, one of you may have done something that hurt the other one. Regardless of whose fault you think it is, at the end of the day, sin is sin. If you both know Jesus then you no longer have a sin nature. The old man has been put off and the new man put on and all that. Your heart is good. That means that the sin must come from some other place. And if that’s the case (and it is) then it’s never more important than in those times that you are together as a team. That you’re able to stand, “back to back, with swords drawn,” as John Eldredge would say. Wait, swords? Why?


Part 2, coming next week!